KC's at home

KC's at home, because the lectures in school today aren't exactly productive. And KC's a man with a plan. A man. A plan. A canal. Panama.

1. bike ride!
2. clear up the mess on the table
3. revision for the coming test

Woke up early. Was laying in bed awake. But this time round it wasn't for the dread of waking up, but just to appreciate the moment. Blue sky, comfy bed, not having to wake up at a deathly hour just to rush to school.

Hung around online for a while, before bike ride. Wheeled my bike out of the door and met a couple of neighbours, somehow they're extra perky this morning! Perky KC, perky neighbours, perky day.

Bike ride's great. Mashing the gears, speeding in the 2nd lane to make a right turn in time, cool weather. Nice. Almost got mauled though.

There was this construction going on in the middle of Old Upper Thomson Road so one lane was closed. They stationed people on both sides of the work area with lollipop STOP/GO signs to direct the traffic. I was given the GO so I just sped on, but this idiot in a car came by head-on and I had to take evasive action. He must've ignored the sign or something.

No harm though. Bulletproof KC refuses to let it get him down!

Did a couple of loops around Old Upper Thomson Road, skipping the reservoir service road (not in the mood for crazy climbs), answering messages on my phone from twinkie and classmates at every end. Turns out my end-of-posting test isn't going to be too bad afterall. Familiar venue, tester is quite a nice guy.


Was musing at how different my legs and thighs look these days. I, erm, actually sorta have rather toned legs after all that cycling and running! Definitely increased my power-to-weight ratio quite alot the past half a year. Instead of a lardy ten-tonne truck I'm more of a zippy van now! Maybe next time, a sports car or a racing motorbike! My speedometer's average ride speed reading's about 3-4kmh faster than last time, which is quite substantial in my eyes.

Back home, and task number 2 - to clear up the mess on the table. It's been months since I've even dared to touch the mess, and packing everything up is like archaelogy. The old forgotten stuff's on the lower layers, compressed by the more recently-used stuff on top.

Weird stuff I found in the lower strata:

Pamphlet + CD on some device that's used to staple piles and haemorrhoids in the anus. Complete with anal dilator "transparent dilator allows clear view" and fix anvil "no accidental detachment". Yup, accidental detatchment will be superbly gross.


First generation Tamagotchi, circa 1997.


Some coffee cookie that my friend gave me months ago and I forgot all about it! Too icky to eat now.


Old bus ticket, before the advent of the contactless ez-link card.

Various school notes I thought I had lost along the way.

Old student concession pass from secondary school with super embarassing photo.

Wooden whistles bought from Malacca.

Postcard from that secret buddy game from junior college orientation. It's like, you write secret postcards to a buddy in the senior class, and then after some time, the secret buddies are revealed. Didn't really enjoy it since it was so corny heh.

Another postcard from a friend. A pity somehow it got folded and creased in the drawer! Sad. Friends went to spain and I joked about buying me back a real fighting bull, so that friend game me a postcard of one haha.


Lotsa stuff to throw out.

Had a quick nap. Surfed the net for a while. Chatted on MSN with secondary school pal of 6 years, about music and all. It's super nice that after all these years, we sorta can understand each other's tastes and all. Exchanged some songs. Theme was covers by punk bands. I sent:

Busted and Mcfly - Build Me Up Buttercup -- a punk rendition of the Motown classic. Lovely.

The Ramones - Spiderman Theme-- The Ramones is one of the fathers of punk!

I received: Busted's live rendition of Where Is The Love (Black Eyed Peas)

Surfed around on Youtube for a while. Some choice picks:

Carole King - You Got A Friend
Mcfly - All About You
Limp Bizkit - Faith (1997 live)
The Killers - Bones --sorta glad that this is their next single, I predicted it! Sadly, there doesn't seem to be any good single-material left on their album.
Kaiser Chiefs - I Predict A Riot (live)

And now, time for task 3 - revision!

The Slippery Slope - how do bad days work?

I've been sorta half-expecting this to happen already. Been feeling progressively crappier as the week progressed. That feeling of numbness, that tiredness that prevents me from rushing to school on time.

The way every little thing irritates me.

So this morning I woke up feeling even crappier than ever, and for no real reason. That's especially creepy because if I don't know the reason, then how am I going to fix it? Felt totally useless, remembering the mess that is my life, and felt even worse.

Ate breakfast while feeling totally down, not making eye contact with the family at all. Went back to my room. Waves of self-destructive feelings. Couldn't ignore them totally. Couple of scratches but nothing major.

It's a bad bad day.

Bad days are like that. They start off bad. Then they get worse, simply because bad things get one down, and then when one's down, one simply doesn't have any more drive to make or keep things alright. Then it gets worse. The slippery slope. Start tumbling, and you're gonna go all the way down to the bottom.

Well at least there's school and friends to distract me from my mind for a big part of the day. So it ain't too bad.



But then, school's school so it isn't so great too. Lectures so boring one starts messaging on the phone, sharing websites with friends on where to download phone themes, musing on how the lighting in the room makes for good abstract photography.

The rest of the day's just trying to stay afloat, keeping oneself reasonably cheerful to keep the evil part of me out of my mind.

Oh well, there's this statistical phenomenon called 'regression to mean'. For random throws of dice, if you get a low number like 2, chances are that you'll get a higher number the next time round!

If today's such a bad day, tomorrow's probably better! Yay!

Mornings

It's always the hardest when I first get out of the bed.

The birds chirp anxiously, while the sky starts to glow a deathly-violet. I lie in my bed, watching the world go by, watching the parents busy themselves getting ready for yet another day of work.

Mornings are the worst because they may start off in any way. And if it starts off bad, it's just a slippery slope downhill from there. It's just superstition, but somehow on bad days one just ends up missing buses and trains, things just somehow go wrong, and it won't end until the next time I see the bed.

I'm afraid to make a move. One wrong move and I'll jinx the whole day into a bad day.

I run my hand along the back of my head, feeling the untidy tangle of hair, just to get some mechanical stimuli to comfort myself. I need strength.

Mornings, and I snap back into the real world and remember the mess that I am. Just numbly recollecting all the things undone, all the things I gotta fix, amidst the sleepy daze. I'm not sad or angry or anything, I'm just numb.

Feeling totally useless for being who I am, letting the things go undone, not being able to even get up from a silly bed.

I just lie in bed until these feelings pass, cause it'll be dangerous and silly of me to try to function that way.

Mornings are the worst.

5 Randon Songs on the playlist early in the morning

Lipps Inc. - Funkytown
It's been a whole decade of 80s music. And somehow the ones that stick aren't the technically and musically accomplished songs, but those that are so dance-catchy we don't want to admit that we love.

Jay-Z and Linkin Park - Encore
This is one hiphop masterpiece and the naysayers can just shut up cause this remix just brings out the best of the original, cutting out the whiney bits, and adding in a great beat. There's always this stigma that lingers with bands that perform to a younger audience, so it's a pity so many of the self-proclaimed music enthusiasts are missing out on so much cause of that.

Radiohead - Black Star
This Radiohead song's one of the greatest. I still remember playing The Bends album over and over again a few years back, savouring the haunting vocal and mellow melancholy.

Wilco - Say You Love Me
CH intro'd me to Wilco and I hafta say, some of Wilco's tracks are really great. Simple and melodic stuff. It's sorta genius how Wilco manages to write something so good with so little words and instruments.

Weezer - Dope Nose
Fast, trippy and happy. I swear that even if it's the first time you're listening to it you'll get hooked!

Arrrrrghhhhhhh

Arrrrrrghhhhhhh.

Think I just want to be alone for a while.

Need. To. Meditate. To. Regain. Powers.

Inertia

Lazy
Nua
Ennui
Fatigue
Slack

I just can't seem to want to do anything! Me ass needs hauling!

Happy Feet!

(No photos, I'm suffering from photographer's fatigue. Actually not really. When everything's happy and busy and fun-filled, the hassle of having to open the shutter cover, stare into the screen and click just gets chucked out of mind.)



Well. This is one happy entry. Happy yappy zappy tappy.

Morning in school, ended really early so my group just went to Burger King to chill over breakfast. Got the cappucinno there, which was really not bad for something out of a fast food chain. Then we all decided to go home, cause there was no tutorials!

Was on the train back home with M, discussing the merits of big clunky DSLR cameras versus the compact everyday kinds. Conclusion: most people - even hobbyists - can be very happy with a high-end compact camera already. Who really needs all 10 megapixels when they all look the same printed on 8R? And it's just so much easier getting candids with something you can slip out from your pocket, rather than pointing a bazooka-lens behemoth right into the faces of your friends.

Went home and changed up for Happy Feet outing! It's like the last outing of a series, so I'm really not sure if that would be the last. (Turns out, at the time of writing this, I decided that everyone can't get enough of outings, so I'm going to try to help start at least an outing.)

Sorta exhausted the A-list in my cupboard so was desperate enough to wear the gray Sims 2 T-shirt my brother gave me. It's ueber geekiness, but I simply got no lighter-coloured T-shirts in my A-list anymore. Since it was lying crumpled in a corner of the cupboard, I had to iron it myself, and being the retarded me, I can't iron for nuts! Still quite crumpled after that.

The mission for today. Get light-coloured T-shirt, hang around with pals Ryan and Ferret, then head off to Happy Feet!

Reached Orchard first, so went to take a quick gander at the CDs in Scotts Gramophone, walked out of Scotts shopping centre and suddenly Jenson appeared out of nowhere while I wasn't even looking! Stalker! He's around Orchard to help his mum sell some stuff in a fair in a nearby hotel. Too bad can't go cause got other shopping to do!

Was early so just hung around Popular. They're selling Genius webcams for rather cheap but I wonder how they are? (at the time of writing, I had googled about it and decided not to buy heh).

Was flipping through Q magazine (a UK alternative and ruck music magazine). They had this feature article that coincided with the release of the 10th anniversary edition of Manic Street Preacher's album Everything Must Go.

A really poignant read, about their ex-guitarist and songwriter Richey Edward's gradual decline into insanity and self destruction, and his eventual disappearance at the Severn Bridge in Wales overlooking a river. That was 1995. No one knows if he's still alive or not. The band had to take some time to get their act together again and deal with the grief (actually they didn't even know how to grief, not knowing if he's alive or not). They finally released Everything Must Go 10 years ago. That album's still considered a masterpiece, with half of the lyrical wory by Richey himself.

Yay then met up with Ryan and the mission-to-get-new-tee-for-KC begins! Went through like a thousand shops. I'm really uninitiated into shopping around Orchard so it's quite an eye-opener, with shopping expert Ryan to lead the way!

Heeren, and sorta decided on an Adidas Climacool tee! In orange! Was mulling over it for quite long. Then decided to try it. It's sorta weird cause the L size was really quite big, and this is like the first time I actually found anything labelled L too big for me. Sleeves flopping over elbows = no good. I don't want to look like one of those little kids wearing oversized shirts cause their parents buy them a size too big so they'll grow into it.

Weird, when you can't get something you want, you'll just want it more!

So began the hunt for the M-sized version of it! It was crazy. So many stores and none had any stock left. Just ambled around Orchard, looking at all the sweet sweet chocolates and biscuits from Marks and Spencers. The white chocolate thingie just looks so good, I'm so gonna buy it next time!

Met up with Ferret halfway. Then went to another couple of stores before finally finding it in that shopping centre below The Cathay.

Sales assistant sorta chatted me up. Some idle chat about school for me, then the sales assistant asked for my name and exchanged names. Would have been nice and all, but the sales assistant was a he. Luckily, no numbers exchanged! Seriously freaked out.

Ben and Jerry's sorbets rock. The one I had was some raspberry thingie (forgot the ral name) which was really tasty and fruity.

Rushed off to Vivocity! Candy Empire! Munching on Ferret's jelly beans from Candy Empire while trying to look for the cinema. They got a gazillion of flavours, and the sour ones such as green apple rocked the best. Somehow reminds me of Bertie Bott's jelly beans from the Harry Potter series with flavours like earwax and pepper, and yes they do have it in the muggle world too but haven't seen it in Singapore yet.

Movie was great. Happy Feet started off slow, but it really expresses the emotions and motivations of the penguins really well, which is something that's hardly seen in a show geared towards children. Well, maybe it's not such a children's show, with so much tribute to popular songs from the 70s and 80s. The music's really sweet, and that by itself makes the whole movie worthwhile already.

Feeling hyper. Somehow the day just felt so perfect. Friends are great, movie is great, everything's great. Was so hyper, that shy and antisocial me actually mimed out a tap-dance outside the cinema!

Hung around after the movie, and somehow Jenson appeared out of nowhere for the 3rd time, so we hung out together. It's just so wonderful and happy and perfect and blissful, I even ran out of adjectives!

More and more I gotta say, it's no longer about STOMP. It's about the friendships. I realise I'm still hanging around the forums, but only for the people I already know. What would I do, without pals like Ryan, Kate, Ferret and Jenson? It's been only such a short time (in terms of friendships) and we're looking out for each other and all, merging into one single telepathic entity.

Well, as usual parting's sad. Went back with Winston and Jenson to Bishan, and quite enjoyed just walking with the 2 of them, talking about stuff and all.