Morning and feeling crappy already

Woke up at 7.30am and laid in bed for half an hour, just too lazy and down to get up. Hid my face in the pillow and bolster, not wanting anyone to see how terrible I felt.

Hauled my ass up from the bed and down the stairs.

Bike ride. Didn't go as fast as I wanted to. On my usual route, there's this long climb that I usually take at a hair above 20kmh but today I sorta burnt out halfway in the climb. Not a good thing.

Promised myself to be safe, but oh well, ended up challenging a doubledecker to overtake me when I was going at 37kmh, and also tailgating a WRX. I know it's super dangerous and I'm feeling guilty over it, but there's a part of me that seeks thrill through putting myself into potential mortal peril. It's sick. I dunno.

Reached home, surfed the STOMP forums for a while, but just feel too crappy to go on.

I dunno. I hope this evening's outing will cheer me up or something. For now, I just want to wallow in my own self pity by myself.

Think I'll lie down for a while.




Feeder - My Perfect Day
Got this dagger in my back
The blade inside me burning
Change these colours in my head
Turn to face the real thing
Prechorus:
So what about me? (I can't take it)
What I wan to be (I won't make it)
What about me? (I can't take it)
Hear me when I speak (I won't make it)

[Chorus:]
But sometimes I feel it, you know how it is
Wake up in the morning and everything fits
I'm still hoping tomorrow feels like this
My perfect day

Twist inside me, feel it break
The rubber band keeps turning
See the tracks worn in my face
Hallucinate, I'm burning

[Prechorus]

[Chorus]
My perfect day, my perfect day

[Bridge:]
I can't believe this anymore
I just don't see this anymore
I'm stepping out into the rain
Again

See my satellite in space
Sending back the weather
Try to find myself some space
Move on up the ladder

[Prechorus:]
(I can't take it)
It's what I wanna be? (I won't make it)
What about me? (I can't take it)
Hear me when I speak (I won't make it)

[Chorus]
My perfect day

[Chorus]
My perfect day, my perfect day